October 31, 2013

Happy Halloween!

It's Halloween!

*sing!* 'THIS, is, Halloween! -- THIS, is, Halloween! -- ...' :D

What are you dressing up as?

Having a good party?


By the way, this is the end of the #ScaryTag! then. :)
Here's a picture of a pumpkin being scared by another pumpkin and laughed at by her other pumpkin friend.

Happy Halloween!
I had a great month! Hope you have a great one!


Let November come with some cold wind and .... the holiday season! Hurrah! :D


Winter is coming. More rain than ever in the whole year. I wish everything would be covered in snow. The air is getting thinner and thinner. Cold, like how I feel inside.

Things are right. Nothing is wrong. I guess I just am feeling... lonely. I try to write. The stacks of those unfilled Christmas cards are there on the table.

I hugged myself, feeling the warm cosy jumper. Pouring back the chocolate powder in, perhaps a little more, dark chocolate is not self indulgent. Not in my rules.

The neighbours have been pretty silent these days. Most are going on holidays. The house is pretty empty but myself. Only the clock ticking, that needs to be fixed. The spoon hitting the internal edges of the cup resonates louder.

Feels like I have got a ton of things to do. I am just not feeling them.

If there are days darker than winter days, it would be at days when I'm feeling like this inside. Nothing feels right. I feel I have given up. But to what? To nothing but chances.

Perhaps a little less sugar next time, note to self. 'That book still needs to be written, Dee', a little voice from within me. 'I know', I reply. I'm a writer, I suppose, even thought one published article in a local magazine does not make a writer, I do want to be a writer, so I will write it. Right now it is only a sense of believing back in myself and jump back up at things.

My mind is blank. Full of little nothings. Artefacts of the past. Not useful, need to be discarded immediately.

Did something hit me recently? Did someone just left me and broke my heart again? No, I thought, that was 7 months ago. 'So what is up, Dee?' 'I am this. This is uncertainty, and I am not good at this. Remember that time in 7th grade when I lost at the competition that defined me. I felt cheated, by me, for not letting me try again. I didn't know what to do then, I don't know what to do now. So I'll just lounge here until I know what to do'. The little voice sighed back at me. 'I know,' I said to the little voice, 'you are a definition of social norms and expectations that I heard, that are not mine, but including mine. I know,' I said, 'I'm sorry.'

The sun is almost setting, I took a deep breath. Should I give up to tire and fall into sleep? Should I move to my bedroom? But I should draw the curtains in first. This chair in the nook and this blanket is too cosy.

Yes, perhaps I should get up and turn up some lights in the house and draw in the curtain. Is the heating system off? It is getting pretty chilly.
I could hear the wind seeping in my window sills. The sound of it. Like someone trying to whistle next to you but could not do it properly. The sound was filling the room. In my mind there was really an invisible person in the room beside me. I don't like that thought.

I got up and drawing in the curtain of this room first. The neighbour's house right across seems pretty alive. At least they leave their front door light on. I wonder have they come back from their holiday... Or do they have someone in the house while they're away... The warmth of family bonds...
It is getting quite dark outside. My focus went back to the reflections of my own room reflected in the window. The chair I sat on, ... those cushions need a wash, ... those socks, how did they got on the floor like that?... the hallway right through this living room,... that painting on the hallway that I painted when I was 10... did my Mum ever liked it truly...? A shadow... a shadowy figure... in the hallway... A shadowy figure...? I'm pretty sure I'm alone in the house. A little girl? ... With a long face and some drape clothes all over her shoulders. She's looking straight at me. Her gaze piercing. Her long hair was loose and messy, she looks sticky and damped. She was crying, ... and angry at the same time... ? She was behind me,... looking straight at me... as if she wants to run straight through me anytime... I'm scared ... Who is she...? I feel the chilly wind again filling in the room... I can hear it...
... and all I knew I was alone in the house...

October 24, 2013

ScaryTag#3 The Laughs, Whistles, Perfume, and Dance

Alright, there were several of them so far, and they are all equally scary to me.

The first one EVER, was when I was around 6 years old. I was in my cousin's house for the holiday, because my nanny was off that day, so my parents put me in my cousin's house for the whole day, so that there was someone, well, my cousin's nanny, to look after me, while they were off to work.

Now, my cousin is as about the same age as me, and she had this MOST AMAZING collection of, mmm... do you know those eraser collectibles? Well, yeah, those.Those so pretty and lovely and minuscule and really cute erasers that you can never have the heart to use them for real erasers, especially for a 6 years old.

Well, I was admiring these lovely collectibles which was lined and displayed neatly on a desk in her bedroom, right next to her bed, facing the wall that was shared with the next door neighbour's, when out of thin air... I heard... A WOMAN LAUGHING! Histerically!
As if from the other side of the wall ...
But the laugh was not normal. If you ever hear a banshee laugh (well I suppose banshees weep,... but imagine them laughing), well it sounded like that.
It was high pitched, shrieking, shrill, maniacal, and overall... WHAT the plum WAS THAT?!

Needless to say, I RAN OUT OF THE ROOM, heart's jumping and all, trying to look calm and cool.

I think I told the nanny I heard something, but she didn't believe me.

Yep, to this day I believe this was why ... ... -- Because ... she ... was ... actually ...
'the one' ... ...
O_O Ooohhhh...

Oh well. :D

Years later, my cousin told me that there was actually something or 'someone' outside of her old bedroom window, the one I was in...
Well, so that might be... -- :S... -- Here's the layout of her old room.

Anyway, there were some other instances, as I said that involved some whistles, perfume scent, and some 'dancing' clothes hangers.

But this post is already long enough, so I'll leave you to that!

At least someone was happy somewhere.
... I suppose ... O.O


October 17, 2013

ScaryTag#2 No Scary Movie

Scariest movie? ALL horror movies!

Well, almost all of them ...

I'm such a big wimp, YET, there are times where I would actually love to watch them. Usually with a friend and I would end up enjoying them. Well, kind of, when the story is really good.

Yesss, :P enjoying pestering my friend from 15 minutes in until the lights are back on that is.

Also! When it's all just jump-scares and overly dramatic and loud music, then I'd feel like wasting money (and time) just to be scared inside the movie theatre. As if life is not hard enough. :S. Besides, the super cute and light-proof cardigan will not help by then as it is not entirely sound-proof.

So scariest movie? (almost) ALL horror movies! You name them!


October 10, 2013

ScaryTag#1 The Scary Scarecrow

When I was real young, someone gave me this "choose your own adventure" kind of book. I suppose because she knew I love reading (still do!), but I don't think she knew that I really didn't enjoy those kinds of books.
Yea, ... I suppose I have chosen to be dull since I was a kid and any sort of "adventure" in anything will make me sneeze 10 times. :)
Okay, actually, it was because they kind of disrupt and distract the real flow of the story and I don't enjoy that.

Anyway, there were these scary scarecrow pictures that would make me feel sooooo scared each time I read the book so I would skip the pages AS SOON AS I COULD every time I was reading it. The scarecrow was a witch, pasty white, scrawny, with witch-y overly pointed face with long nose, straw-like hair, and yellow eyes like owls (I mean, yellow?! Really?! For children's books!).
Apparently it worked for human babies too apart from crows. Well, I found it so scary I still remember it until today!
So in the spirit of Halloween, I challenged myself to revisit the pages and post the pictures, but... I couldn't find the book! :S


October 03, 2013

October #ScaryTag!

Hellow there!

As October is the month Halloween, and it overall feels like a spooky month, let's build up to that!

I will have some kind of a tag every Thursday of this month, which is the Scary Tag! #ScaryTag!
Basically answering the following 5 questions:
  • Scariest children's book.
  • Scariest movie.
  • Scariest somewhat paranormal experience.
  • Scary creative writing.
So, yes, looking forward to this! :D It will end on Halloween day, and ...

come back here to be scared every Thursday all along October, and fall harder to sleep in varying difficulty levels!