MERRY CHRISTMAS!

It's CHRISTMAS! Finally!

Wishing you and your loved ones a wonderful Christmas time, and a happy HOLIDAY!! :D
Let the twelve days of Christmas begin! :)

In another note, I was supposed to go to a Christmas dinner with friends tonight, but I am currently down with the cold, so I don't have much of a Christmas celebration story here.

I hope you're having a better Christmas celebration, and,... probably,... if you're going out to a dinner party where you know there will be this person that you really like there, I'm just saying, but, wearing a mistletoe berries bow might come in handy. Just maybe. ;)
Who knows? Besides, it definitely counts as a festive accessories.

Happy Christmas everyone! :))


All warm and fuzzy inside (and shivering with the cold physically),

How (Not) To Keep Warm ... Sometimes ...

With the colder months around, or really in my case currently, the advancement of air conditioner technology, even with extra layers of clothes on, sometimes I just wish that I am a either a turtle or a pangolin that can curl myself up into a ball anywhere.

But as I am a sadder race of human, here are a few of my attempted ways to keep warm. Success rate is relative. I learned to accept we live in a world of relativity. Whatever that means. :S

1. Cuddle with your laptop on bed. Or warm your feet on the adaptor. ... ... ... ??
   
   
   
   Welcome to the 21st century! BAM! Sorry, Cat, you're replaced... :S
   
   
   
   
2. Stay VERY close to the oven while baking a cake. Bonus point, tantalising aroma. Downside, fighting the temptation to eat the cake AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!
   
3. Think of your crush. If the thought does not warm you then probably that's not the one.
   
   
4. It's all in your mind! The mental power for the win!
   
   
   
5. Last but not least, think of the most embarrassing moment of your life. Imagine how flustered you were. Relive that moment, and, ... feeling that rush of embarrassment to your face? GOOD. :D

Brrr!
One of them might work right?

Hugs!

Catching Fire Thoughts

So I FINALLY watched Catching Fire last weekend. I said finally because obviously I am probably one of the last persons to watch it.

I have been waiting for this movie for as long as since the first movie was out! So, as predicted, it did left quite an impression on me.

Here they are!

WARNING: This post might or might not contain spoilers. :)

1. This needs to be the first point, before anything else, I just need to say, why is Jennifer Lawrence so PERFECT? Just why. She's funny, smart, and talented. Did I mentioned an Oscar winner at such a young age? :S
   
   
   
   
   Oh yes, the life of an old hag spent with jealousy. :P
2. I genuinely cried during that scene with Rue's family. She was my favourite character. Thankfully it was dark.
3. I want Effie's gold hair! Seriously! Shoud I say ... Goldeous? :] I really mean gorgeous.
4. Thank goodness for a milder PG-13. Even though, I should say, I was well prepared this time.
   
   
   
5. Mid-way, I started thinking that the recipe to a successful trilogy is to make sure that the main character is a girl, and in the second book she has to choose so hard in between 2 ridiculously dreamy boys. I wish that is how real life is. Probably that is partially why it sells so well. I buy that.
   
6. I love, love, LOVE Johanna Mason, and ...
7. Sam Claflin, oh Sam Claflin truly never dissapoints. I slept well that night ;).

Oh, I did enjoyed this one massively, but I think I enjoyed the last one better, as this time there was less food except for those Capitol macarons!
I wish there were more!

Yup, that is the only deciding factor for a glutton.


Wishing so bad she's (at least) one tenth as cool as Jennifer Lawrence,
Emm

Fitness Goals

All through this December I have been planning on nothing but basking myself in the glory of the festive season. The things on my mind was nothing but celebrations and happiness and joy and Christmas... So to say, a time to slow down and have fun.

Well, that was until I got home last night only to find a dear family member was not feeling very well. Kind of felt like a reminder that life never stops for a holiday season, and that no matter what, it might be good to keep paying attention to our health. Daily.

So not playing the party pooper, but it got me thinking what I could've done better to take care of my and my family's health in general. Oh in a cheery red and green way. *GRIN*

1. To start exercising, move around and be active!
   
   I'm so lazy at this. The last and only time I exercised was probably during that once a week PE lessons in high school, in which any outdoor activities like basketball and volleyball will be done by murmuring under my breath. :S
   
   
   :D
   IF I have to pick a new exercise activity though, I think it would be great to go back practising my flag tossing and spinning. Although a male constructor worker's over-toned upper arm muscly look is always the threat. I took years to flab them back. Or perhaps I'll resort back to dancing!
   
   
2. 'Stop avoiding food that are good for you, just because you don't like them!'
   
   
   
   Well, in that case, unless you're a duck. :)) They eat gravel.
   
   
3. Get enough sleep. Also, start sleeping BEFORE midnight.
   
   
   
   THIS has to be my worst vice. EVER. I have yet to master the ability to hibernate my mind at night (after I hibernate my computer ;)). That skill should've been thought in primary schools! As of now, I think I'll pass for a lesser looking vampire as no amount of concealer will look normal on me. Please don't be scared.
   
   
4. Eat on time when hungry. Note to self: eating in dreams doesn't count, even if you'll wake up feeling not hungry anymore.
   
   
5. Keep positive thoughts. Because hopefully, that will lead to better life decisions and less self destructing activities (I really mean like too much super sugary doughnuts). :D

In summary, eat well, sleep well, think well, and exercise!

What would be in your list? I'm quite bad at it, thus I have quite a few points. Are you already a fit health conscious person? Way to go, you! :))


xo
Emm

Some Quick Words... #8 - Meet Will and Way

Today after a short conversation with a friend, he sparked this thought in my mind that is totally original . :P

Behold for ...


'WHEN THERE'S A WILL, THERE'S A WAY!'

Yep. Sure.

Because Will and Way is the new and improved version of Sesame Street's two headed monster. Oh yes. :)

Or Way is Will's shadow.

Yep. That must be it.
No other explanations.

...

I really am feeling that the weeks from December 1 to 24 always feels like the longest time throughout the whole year.
Also lately I feel like I can use a bit of pick-me-up. Literally, someone please pick me up from lounging too much on bed and be completely unproductive. :S

So yes, we can go through this week. Just think of the holidays!

Are you feeling the mid-December sloth mood too?


Lots of love,
Emm

Heartwarming Family Story: That Time I Pushed My Brother :S

End of year holiday season is the perfect time for family. :) To feel a little bit more mellow than usual, and to reminisce the warm and cuddly family moments.

Well this is one of those family moments for me. Sort of.

When I was a kid, I used to have this ice cream parlour birthday club membership so that every year on my birthday I will have a free scoop of ice cream! Yayyy!

Somehow when I was around 9 years old, I had another scoop to spare. They were in the form of redeemable birthday postcards, and I received two that year!

So we went to the ice cream parlour that night, all happy and excited, me, my dad, and my younger brother.
I got my favourite scoop of almond and chocolate fudge ice cream, and the extra scoop of course went to my brother.
He was soooo happy that his chubby snoopy face looked excited, curious, and well lit up. :))

'His face was well lit up...' :P

Anyway, so we walked back to the car eating the ice cream and things were well and fine until it was time to get into the car, and my brother was in my step.
Oh the tiny tot who just learned to walk :S.

Suddenly, (praying for mercy to my very repressed memory it wasn't deliberate) I accidentally pushed him to get into the car faster.

Aaaaaa! Oops! Oh dear!
The little guy stumbled, and the ice cream...
the ice cream ...
fell...
it fell to the ground...
and being ice cream, of course it was irrevocable, it couldn't be picked up!

Of the poor little thing straight away went into tears. I really mean my brother, not the ice cream. :s
My dad, the very patient dad that he is just went 'awww...' and tried to calm him down.

I fell quiet at once.
I remember not really wanting to share given that I was also a kid, but really, my mouth tasted only of chocolate fudge ice cream and GUILT for the following few days.

In fact, I think I still can somewhat taste it now. Mmm... *gulp* :S Not yum.


Guilty as charged,
Emm

Some Quick Words... #7 - In Shaping the Future

I suppose if I really want to be a good cook then I reckon I should've start cooking carefully and reading, and practising, all those cooking techniques as of now. Start acting like a real good cook will!

Hmmm...

Well, just saying, IF... and really... can be quite a devastating combination.


:))
Emm

It's December!

It's December!

Are you excited about the holiday season as much as I am?? Can I say the Ch word now???... Yes? Yes? :D Yes!

I'M EXCITED FOR CHRISTMAS!!! -- Well, okay, and New Year. :D

How the streets will light up with festive lights.
How songs that send whiffs of warmth and cinnamon buns will be playing in places making me all mellow and fuzzy inside. *sniff, sniff away!*
How there will be holiday special drinks and meals in restaurants and cafes! :D

I wish this drink is real, ... :D then I'll be like "mmm... spicy, meaty, and electrifying..." :D

Then ... the cooler weather, enough said.
But, most importantly, of course, the year end holiday season itself!


Yippiiieeee!!! :D

What are you most excited about the Holiday Season?


Come here and cuddle under this big blanket! :D *scoot*
Emm

It's Getting Cooler!

Hello, :)

It's been raining constantly every day for the past week. I love it, the weather is getting cooler and cooler. This is as chilly as it gets where I am currently living.

Cooler weather like this always come with certain feelings and memories for me every year, though.
Well, ... here are some of them.

• Reading Harry Potter book intensely day in day out for the Nth time
• Reading any novels!
• Reading, just reading, from morning 'til night
• The smell of the paper, old books, new books, all of them
• Playing ALL DAY LONG and only stopping for shower and toilet breaks (eating while playing)
• Sleeping in until past noon
• Shivering while showering (my bathroom has an over-sized ventilation directly to the backyard) :s 
• Break-ups
• Hot chocolates with marshmallows and plain hot tea
• Baking all kinds of cookies and eating a dozen of freshly baked blueberry muffins! -- Yep, that happened, all in one go!
  Sort ... of ... proud ... ... :S

How's the current weather in your area and what feelings / memory does it bring for you during this time of the year? :)

Much love from under the wrap of the blanket,
Emm

The Big Girl in The Big City

It was pouring rain that morning in Gigantica. An industrial city. The fog was thick and it was muddy everywhere.

The busy city run around its usual hectic schedule. Nothing would have stopped it. Not even the thunderstorm. 

People were rushing past each other without looking at each other in the face. There was no time to do so.

The mass transportation system was as busy transporting people from one point to the other. 

There was always too little time.

Out of nowhere the people hear a crying sound. Loud enough for the whole city to hear. But still, no one was stopping. There were things to attend to.

Then suddenly the mud somehow got thicker, and the puddles got deeper and wider.

Deep enough that the sewers could not contain it any longer. The water has risen to ankle deep.

The people kept walking briskly. Like nothing happened.

The shadows from the city skyline then got darker and darker. Something unusual was happening.

Among the buildings there showed up a girl. A very big girl. 

She seemed to made out of steel, as tall as the tallest building. 

She stepped into the city, and vehicles passed by avoiding her feet.

Now it is clear where the crying was from. The big girl was adding more water to that of the rain.

She stared and stared to the people. Crying louder with each minute.

But no one even seemed to notice her there. They had things to attend to. There was always not enough time.

Then suddenly as sudden as she came, the crying stopped. 

She stood still in her place, ... and out of that big girl came out ... a little girl. 

A little girl with a very big coat.

She dropped the overweight coat, and walked along with the other people.

This way, someday, she too, will be a real big girl.

Happy Halloween!

It's Halloween!

*sing!* 'THIS, is, Halloween! -- THIS, is, Halloween! -- ...' :D

What are you dressing up as?

Having a good party?

Yeah!

By the way, this is the end of the #ScaryTag! then. :)
Here's a picture of a pumpkin being scared by another pumpkin and laughed at by her other pumpkin friend.

Happy Halloween!
I had a great month! Hope you have a great one!

xxxoo


Let November come with some cold wind and .... the holiday season! Hurrah! :D

Shadows

Winter is coming. More rain than ever in the whole year. I wish everything would be covered in snow. The air is getting thinner and thinner. Cold, like how I feel inside.

Things are right. Nothing is wrong. I guess I just am feeling... lonely. I try to write. The stacks of those unfilled Christmas cards are there on the table.

I hugged myself, feeling the warm cosy jumper. Pouring back the chocolate powder in, perhaps a little more, dark chocolate is not self indulgent. Not in my rules.

The neighbours have been pretty silent these days. Most are going on holidays. The house is pretty empty but myself. Only the clock ticking, that needs to be fixed. The spoon hitting the internal edges of the cup resonates louder.

Feels like I have got a ton of things to do. I am just not feeling them.

If there are days darker than winter days, it would be at days when I'm feeling like this inside. Nothing feels right. I feel I have given up. But to what? To nothing but chances.

Perhaps a little less sugar next time, note to self. 'That book still needs to be written, Dee', a little voice from within me. 'I know', I reply. I'm a writer, I suppose, even thought one published article in a local magazine does not make a writer, I do want to be a writer, so I will write it. Right now it is only a sense of believing back in myself and jump back up at things.

My mind is blank. Full of little nothings. Artefacts of the past. Not useful, need to be discarded immediately.

Did something hit me recently? Did someone just left me and broke my heart again? No, I thought, that was 7 months ago. 'So what is up, Dee?' 'I am this. This is uncertainty, and I am not good at this. Remember that time in 7th grade when I lost at the competition that defined me. I felt cheated, by me, for not letting me try again. I didn't know what to do then, I don't know what to do now. So I'll just lounge here until I know what to do'. The little voice sighed back at me. 'I know,' I said to the little voice, 'you are a definition of social norms and expectations that I heard, that are not mine, but including mine. I know,' I said, 'I'm sorry.'

The sun is almost setting, I took a deep breath. Should I give up to tire and fall into sleep? Should I move to my bedroom? But I should draw the curtains in first. This chair in the nook and this blanket is too cosy.

Yes, perhaps I should get up and turn up some lights in the house and draw in the curtain. Is the heating system off? It is getting pretty chilly.
I could hear the wind seeping in my window sills. The sound of it. Like someone trying to whistle next to you but could not do it properly. The sound was filling the room. In my mind there was really an invisible person in the room beside me. I don't like that thought.

I got up and drawing in the curtain of this room first. The neighbour's house right across seems pretty alive. At least they leave their front door light on. I wonder have they come back from their holiday... Or do they have someone in the house while they're away... The warmth of family bonds...
It is getting quite dark outside. My focus went back to the reflections of my own room reflected in the window. The chair I sat on, ... those cushions need a wash, ... those socks, how did they got on the floor like that?... the hallway right through this living room,... that painting on the hallway that I painted when I was 10... did my Mum ever liked it truly...? A shadow... a shadowy figure... in the hallway... A shadowy figure...? I'm pretty sure I'm alone in the house. A little girl? ... With a long face and some drape clothes all over her shoulders. She's looking straight at me. Her gaze piercing. Her long hair was loose and messy, she looks sticky and damped. She was crying, ... and angry at the same time... ? She was behind me,... looking straight at me... as if she wants to run straight through me anytime... I'm scared ... Who is she...? I feel the chilly wind again filling in the room... I can hear it...
... and all I knew I was alone in the house...

ScaryTag#3 The Laughs, Whistles, Perfume, and Dance

Alright, there were several of them so far, and they are all equally scary to me.

The first one EVER, was when I was around 6 years old. I was in my cousin's house for the holiday, because my nanny was off that day, so my parents put me in my cousin's house for the whole day, so that there was someone, well, my cousin's nanny, to look after me, while they were off to work.

Now, my cousin is as about the same age as me, and she had this MOST AMAZING collection of, mmm... do you know those eraser collectibles? Well, yeah, those.Those so pretty and lovely and minuscule and really cute erasers that you can never have the heart to use them for real erasers, especially for a 6 years old.

Well, I was admiring these lovely collectibles which was lined and displayed neatly on a desk in her bedroom, right next to her bed, facing the wall that was shared with the next door neighbour's, when out of thin air... I heard... A WOMAN LAUGHING! Histerically!
As if from the other side of the wall ...
But the laugh was not normal. If you ever hear a banshee laugh (well I suppose banshees weep,... but imagine them laughing), well it sounded like that.
It was high pitched, shrieking, shrill, maniacal, and overall... WHAT the plum WAS THAT?!

Needless to say, I RAN OUT OF THE ROOM, heart's jumping and all, trying to look calm and cool.

I think I told the nanny I heard something, but she didn't believe me.

Yep, to this day I believe this was why ... ... -- Because ... she ... was ... actually ...
'the one' ... ...
O_O Ooohhhh...

Oh well. :D

Years later, my cousin told me that there was actually something or 'someone' outside of her old bedroom window, the one I was in...
Well, so that might be... -- :S... -- Here's the layout of her old room.

Anyway, there were some other instances, as I said that involved some whistles, perfume scent, and some 'dancing' clothes hangers.

But this post is already long enough, so I'll leave you to that!

At least someone was happy somewhere.
... I suppose ... O.O


Oop!

ScaryTag#2 No Scary Movie

Scariest movie? ALL horror movies!

Well, almost all of them ...

I'm such a big wimp, YET, there are times where I would actually love to watch them. Usually with a friend and I would end up enjoying them. Well, kind of, when the story is really good.

Yesss, :P enjoying pestering my friend from 15 minutes in until the lights are back on that is.

Also! When it's all just jump-scares and overly dramatic and loud music, then I'd feel like wasting money (and time) just to be scared inside the movie theatre. As if life is not hard enough. :S. Besides, the super cute and light-proof cardigan will not help by then as it is not entirely sound-proof.


So scariest movie? (almost) ALL horror movies! You name them!

Whoop!

ScaryTag#1 The Scary Scarecrow

When I was real young, someone gave me this "choose your own adventure" kind of book. I suppose because she knew I love reading (still do!), but I don't think she knew that I really didn't enjoy those kinds of books.
Yea, ... I suppose I have chosen to be dull since I was a kid and any sort of "adventure" in anything will make me sneeze 10 times. :)
Okay, actually, it was because they kind of disrupt and distract the real flow of the story and I don't enjoy that.

Anyway, there were these scary scarecrow pictures that would make me feel sooooo scared each time I read the book so I would skip the pages AS SOON AS I COULD every time I was reading it. The scarecrow was a witch, pasty white, scrawny, with witch-y overly pointed face with long nose, straw-like hair, and yellow eyes like owls (I mean, yellow?! Really?! For children's books!).
Apparently it worked for human babies too apart from crows. Well, I found it so scary I still remember it until today!
So in the spirit of Halloween, I challenged myself to revisit the pages and post the pictures, but... I couldn't find the book! :S

Boo!

October #ScaryTag!

Hellow there!

As October is the month Halloween, and it overall feels like a spooky month, let's build up to that!

I will have some kind of a tag every Thursday of this month, which is the Scary Tag! #ScaryTag!
Basically answering the following 5 questions:

• Scariest children's book.
• Scariest movie.
• Scariest somewhat paranormal experience.
• Scary creative writing.

So, yes, looking forward to this! :D It will end on Halloween day, and ...

come back here to be scared every Thursday all along October, and fall harder to sleep in varying difficulty levels!


Duink!

Blogtember Day 14 - COMFORT, eep!

React to this term: ... comfort ...

If you ever think the about the word "comfort", or you are feeling a little bit blue, and feeling like needing some comfort right now, let's take it to the technical level and get rid of that lingering blue feeling...

Well, ... I just think that "COMFORT", c-o-m-f-o-r-t, is not a really pretty word if we do not know what it means! Try to say it over and over again, like every word, it will sound weird in the end, and truly, I don't think the word comfort represents what it should mean.

The thing about words, and languages, of course, they are there to give us a common ground in describing some things we know. So then we associate that thing with the word, and so even though the word comfort in my mind helps to pop images like cushions, sofa, warmth, quilt, bed, and people hugging, the word itself, well, it doesn't really sound pretty, does it? Coooommmmmfffoooortttt. Eep! :S

It sounds more like, come forth! Or... why is there a fort in it?... A fort is hard, and tough, and cold... Such confusing conflicting word ... :P

I think the things that comfort describes should be called as "fluff", or "mmmhhhh", or even "^^hmmm..." instead. Don't you think? Talking about some gibberish language in the most random manner me, yes. Haha. Sorry for the rambling, I'd like to present you with the etymology of the word or the history of the term, but I haven't search them yet. Also, I wanted to describe what the term comfort is to me, but I thought that would be boring, so...*
 
:D

Happy Friday!
Hope you have a good one,
Em

*Well, okay, here are some things that are in my term of comfort.
A hug, the longest hug, the warmth from a bonfire in a cold night, curling under the duvet on the coolest fluffiest bed, pillows, cushions, a tub full of warm water, and a bathroom with flickering scented candles! --As long as they are not suffocatingly overly sweetly scented. :S

From Greece with LOVE

A little update! My cousin just got back from Greece! She bought me back some beautiful little trinkets that I mentioned, here. Now I'm going to to show you them!

Look how pretty! :)

Note the decorated plastic bag (is also in blue).

There is a definite air of warm sea water, subtle warm sunshine, and white washed walls on them. I'm not quite sure why ... I'd love to go there too myself some time.

1. Olive Oil Bar Soap
I cannot find the brand of this soap, but she says there are just common items found for tourists. Oh well, I'm not complaining, I love olive oil. My friend even teases me for it, since I always say, 'Dry hair? Try Olive Oil!' 'Ooh! Dry skin! Use some olive oil!'. Olive oil gullible girl. :P
Anyway, It does look like something my aunt would buy loads of though, and it does smells ... SO NICE! :)) Soaps make me happy! Since they smell nice, clean, and fresh? Odd, I know.
No, it does not smell anything like real olive oil though.

2. Evil Eye Bracelet and Pouch
Did you notice the design of those bracelet beads? ... Those darker blue, with white dots, then light blue dots, and finally black dots? Notice how there is one too on the zip of the pouch?
Apparently they are called the evil eye. It is believed that people (or wizards in the past? :P) can transfer bad luck to you by looking at you. Thus the evil eye is meant to protect you by looking at the person back. Or so said Wikipedia and some other website references I read from. :P Yup, we learn new things every day, don't we? Now we know! Or perhaps you already knew, haha.
Lucky me my cousin didn't hear the tour guide well enough when she was explaining about this. Else she wouldn't have gave them to me. :P Orrr ... she would've bought more for herself and excitedly explain them to me. She just knew it meant something then.
Oh yes I'll be wearing them often! Besides, they are in BLUE! :D

Side note, she also brought my brother a milk chocolate bar made out of CAMEL'S MILK! She said it is a thing in Greece and its neighbouring areas. I did not get a taste of it, it was gone before I could try some of it. I guess... my brother enjoys camel's milk. ;) Do you think it tastes like normal milk chocolate though?


Dreaming of longgg relaxing vacations, ... where would you prefer to go? ...

OX,
Em

Blogtember Day 5 - Are You an INTP Too ?

Please tell me you are, ... and then we'll talk about how our relationships go with other people. Also, I don't know many other INTPs, ... or ENTPs anyway.

Well, assuming Briggs and Myers and ... are right, since there are no futher follow-up theories yet about these (or are there?), then, I am an INTP! :D

So this is how I am going to identify myself with the provided definitions.


Truthfully, I have taken the tests much more than one time. The first time was in university for one of the courses, it was a short free web version with multiple choice questions all along, and I remember I got as INTJ. Then I took it again for another course at the university, same kind of test, but this time the longer version.

They identified me as INF- something. Point is the first 2 are always IN. So I am definite IN-- something something, where the last two might be because of only slight tendencies to one of the options given the questions.

Now some time around last year, I took a more formal sit down test for it. This time it was pencil and paper based, the questions were not only multiple choice questions, it was a paid one, and so it does looks more acredited, and so I'm going to use that result. Yes, I am INTP (again)! Haha.

Going into the actual descriptions. These are the points that I feel the most me, whereas the rest may be ... mmmhhh... okay, that could've been me at times. But there are the ones that are actually spot on! ALL THE TIME! Here they are!

It says...
(Source: http://www.personalitypage.com/INTP.html)

What I feel the most me:
"

1. They approach problems and theories with enthusiasm and skepticism, ignoring existing rules and opinions and defining their own approach to the resolution. They seek patterns and logical explanations for anything that interests them.
2. They love to discuss these concepts with others. - One of my exes hated this. He though it may lead to disputes and he hates arguing. I love arguing for fun!
3. They hate to work on routine things - they would much prefer to build complex theoretical solutions, and leave the implementation of the system to others. - Sounds like a horrible person, but true! :P
4. The INTP is likely to be very shy when it comes to meeting new people. On the other hand, the INTP is very self-confident and gregarious around people they know well, or when discussing theories which they fully understand. - To a shame.
5. The INTP has no understanding or value for decisions made on the basis of personal subjectivity or feelings. - More below.
6. For this reason, INTPs are usually not in-tune with how people are feeling, and are not naturally well-equiped to meet the emotional needs of others.
7. The INTP is usually very independent, unconventional, and original. 

"

I asked a friend, and these are what she thought true of me:
"

1. They may seem "dreamy" and distant to others, ... - One, even called me Luna-Lovegood-like. Sounds too good to be true that one.
2. INTPs do not like to lead or control people. They're very tolerant and flexible in most situations, unless one of their firmly held beliefs has been violated or challenged, in which case they may take a very rigid stance.
3. Since their Feeling side is their least developed trait, the INTP may have difficulty giving the warmth and support that is sometimes necessary in intimate relationships.
4. If the INTP has not developed their Sensing side sufficiently, they may become unaware of their environment, and exhibit weakness in performing maintenance-type tasks, such as bill-paying and dressing appropriately. - One person I knew complaint that I don't wear makeup at all almost every day, and yes, I know my hair looks like Einstein's almost (if not) always.
5. They usually have complex characters, - I get this A LOT from people. 

"

What I wish to be true:
"
The INTP is at his best when he can work on his theories independently. When given an environment which supports his creative genius and possible eccentricity, the INTP can accomplish truly remarkable things. These are the pioneers of new thoughts in our society.

"

From the personal development page, here are some other insights, the strengths and weaknesses, and the suggestions. The weaknesses made it sound as if we INTPs are so socially handicapped with 0 EQ, and they were trying to help and highlight that. Badly. :D  

"
INTPs who isolate themselves rarely feel happy or successful. The INTP's feeling of success depends upon their opportunities to exercise their active mind, their opportunities to seek and find Truth, and the condition of their relationships and extraverted life. 

"  

"

1. They have a natural ability to focus and get "into the zone" when working on a problem. They can absorb their minds completely with an issue, and work it through with amazing speed and accuracy. This ability makes them outstanding trouble-shooters. Since their logical abilities are dependent on their experiences, their abilities will increase with time. INTPs with experience are often seen as the "gurus" of their professions. - Does this mean I can be a beauty guru? ;) But I'd be too straightforward, 'Makeup?... Who neeeddsss makeup?! ... You are beautiful just the way you are...! C'mon, compared to having extra sleep every morning, and the amount of money you can save to be spent on something else...?" :P
2. Their respect for precision in communication lends them the ability to accurately convey their ideas and discoveries in full.
3. They are usually quite intelligent and can grasp difficult concepts.
4. They are often jovial and good-natured, with a good sense of humor.
5. They are not overly demanding in personal relationships, and have simple daily needs. They are often easy and enjoyable to live with. - People whom I've with would understand this, as basically I was the "ghost" house mate. But other people who doesn't know me that well would be afraid to try, they usually think I will be mad THE WHOLE TIME. C'mon who does that?...

"

"

1. The INTP gets "stuck in a rut" and only does those things that are known and comfortable to the INTP.
2. The INTP resists and rejects anything that doesn't support their own experiential understanding of the world. If they perceive that something is not logical, they reject it as unimportant. - I am so afraid of this.
3. They reject people who think or live differently than themselves.
4. They may be extremely caustic and insulting to others.
5. They may become isolated from society.
6. They may become overly paranoid about social organizations and institutions trying to control them.
7. They may unknowingly or uncaringly hurt people's feelings.- Oh happened too many times.
8. They may be completely unaware of how to express their inner world to others in a meaningful way.
9. They may be completely unaware of the type of communication that is often desireable and (to some degree) expected in an intimate relationship. If they are aware of the kinds of things that are appropriate to say and do to foster emotional bonding, they may be unable to appreciate the value of such actions. They may feel too vulnerable to express themselves in this fashion, and so reject the entire idea.
10. If pushed beyond their comfort level to form commitments or emotional bonds, they may reject a relationship entirely.
11. Under stress, they may show intense emotions that seem disproportionate to the situation.
12. They may not recognize basic social principles, such as appropriate dress and general behavior.

"

"
Recognize Social Principles. Realize that our society functions around some basic social principles, and that our society would fail unless those principles are recognized and upheld. In a democracy, people vote. At a red stoplight, people stop. If people stopped voting because it wasn't important them, who would be in power? If people stopped stopping at red stop lights because it didn't fit into their plans, how could we drive safely? Your priorities and plans are important, but you must recognize that the external world's agenda is also important. Don't dismiss the importance of principles that don't affect your life directly. - I like this one, gave me another perspective.

"

Basically feels good since it's like a justification of being a beep horrible person. :P Truly, though that can't be justifiable right?...



What were yours, what were yours, what were yours?! Do tell me... :)) Click the link to the free online quiz, here.


Love,
Em

P.S.: I was making a video about this before I know about Blogtember, but apparently this post is going to be up first. :)

Blogtember Day 3 - How I Manage My Anger

"Pass on some useful advice or information you learned and always remembered."

The theme for today is to pass on some useful advice or information that I leaned and always remember?

There is actually one that I learned quite recently, about three years ago. I used to be a very emotional person, like my Mum, as I said here. :) I still am today, though I'd LOVE to say, and I hope I can say it, that I got better in controlling my emotions. Specifically anger.

I'm not saying that I have perfected the skill, or else my ex wouldn't say that I'm always angry for the littlest things. Oops. :P In my defense, for the past years, I was merely rambling, it felt NOTHING like the complete HOT, RAW sudden burst of emotions I felt before, and it felt GOOOODDD, for me at least. Haha. Granted I should've known that ranting would make the other person uncomfortable as well, ... but I didn't! :P So, the point is, I am still learning, but there is a lesson here, an information, that I hope at least partially useful, that I learned so far, and always remember.


In my opinion, anger is basically always derived from FEAR. In incapability to handle that pang of fear, came a sudden panic reaction, and frustation that is then felt as that raw, rough, powerful, sweeping, HOT emotion, that was pushing to be expressed. Or else it feels like we will explode. True story, we won't though.
But like dealing with a bratty kid, we cannot help to fall for his demand. Then we entertain him, feed the anger, and just like a bratty kid, the more we feed him, the worse he becomes.
This is worsen by the condition that, if you are like me, anger is labelled as a negative emotion that needs to be avoided at ALL TIME. The thing is, we cannot evade anger. It is a natural state and a part of the spectrum of human emotions. It is very natural and normal to experience anger. But there ARE other ways to express anger than to burst in flames, and no, I'm not talking about revenge.
I am NOT also going to say that anger is a positive emotion. It is bad to me. Bad, really bad to the people I know and who knows me as well. But, ... there are ways to express it, and proven ways to get away with it. Ways to relieve it, without hurting anyone, including yourself, and this is what we are going to talk about today.

1. To control that HOT emotion.
HOW?
First and foremost I think it is to understand that anger is based on fear. Let me know If I am wrong here, but this is true ALL THE TIME for me. So when I feel anger, the first thing I do to control that HOT emotion is to identify the source of my anger, what was it that I afraid of?
Mind you, my responses to these can be the silliest things. For example, it always gets me when my parents or my brother, or anyone in no particular, walks back and forth, seemingly aimlessly, in front of my bathroom door, when I'm taking a shower. Granted it's also called a pet peeve, but what it really is was that since my bathroom door has this glass panel in the middle of it, nevertheless blurry, you can sort of see through it, also, I was scared that they can see what I was doing inside! Eugh! That would feel like being watched, that is so uncomfortable, and I can't freely do anything that I want in the bathroom. Also, since the walls weren't sound proof either, when they are in that close proximity, no matter how loud the sound of the water will be, they might hear me SING (oh dear gods, no)! Or talking to myself (I think out loud in the shower too). Point is, I was scared they could hear or see what I was up to, and I was scared of what they might've think of me! Mind you, I might be a very shy weird person.
Phew, that was a long explanation.
Now the thing is, whatever they were supposed to do in the close proximity to the bathroom is not wrong! OF COURSE! They weren't doing anything to harm me, specifically, or eavesdropping intentionally. It was just basically how I chose to feel responding to the situation! Then in my fear and seemingly incapability to do anything to overcome that fear, I felt anger instead.

Oh it applies to everything. The most common one is for example, you will be angry when someone is late. The common phrase will be, "Shame on you! You selfish PIG! You have NO RESPECT of my time! I ALWAYS try my best to be on time so that people do not have to wait for me!"
Read those words carefully. What argument is in there but ego?
Whereas the underlying fear can be anything really. You are afraid that you are going to miss the show (in the cinema). You are afraid of being late to the party and what your friends that have been there waiting for you would think. You are afraid that the person does not like you enough so they were trying to postpone meeting you. Or you were afraid that they don't think that you are good enough to be waited on earlier before you come. Or... you are afraid of the wait itself, that you will have nothing to do, and that you will be wasting your time. Seriously, the good use of your time is entirely up to you, even while waiting, or even the option to wait or not.

So, don't hold on to it. To our anger, I mean. You know what it said, drop it like it's hot!
Okay out of context, :) but IT IS HOT! Why holding on someting hot? Would you hold a burning red inglot in your hands? No! It hurts, isn't it, and you shouldn't! It will burn you! Nor should you throw it to someone else! It will hurt them!

It takes practice I tell you. I wasn't sucessful the first few couple of times, I was still feeling the need to hit something those first few couple of times.

Usually it was the wall, but then I cried because it hurt. :/ Eep! So then I started to punch my pillows instead. But they were too fluffy and adorable, and so I stopped doing it (what? haha).
Tell yourself it's okay. Emotions don't stay. Nothing in this world does. I always promise myself that once I get in my room and breathe the cool air, I will not remember anything about it unless I let my self to.


2. Express your anger assertively, simply tell them what you need.
The formula is said to be something like this, ... or this is my version:

"Oh no! Having you doing [a] makes me feel [b] because [c], would you just do [d] each time you do that instead?"

e.g.

"Oh no! Having you clicking your tounge like that repetitively makes me feel anxious because I feel like I'm being rushed, it really is not a good feeling, would you not do that when I'm around please?"

They also do tell that the voice should be warm and welcoming. Have no idea yet how that sounds, haha, but I think it should definitely not raised voice, in normal tone, firm, but clear, and welcoming for inputs. Does that make sense? Haha, sorry. There was these several websites that you can refer to for the full on explanation, but I lost the links, I'll link it when I find them again. :)


3. Last but not least, somehow I think when we are deprived of our basic needs, it will be easier for us to get irritated and thus angry, since we can't think straight enough. So avoid all things all the best we can that will make us irritable the whole time. Those mood bars in The Sims? Much like that.
Drink plenty of water, get enough sleep, feed yourself all you can, don't hold on when you need to 'let it go' to the loo, and generally, find things that will make you happy! Do them! Sometimes some distractions can work wonders too! :)) Oh Youtube and Bloglovin can be amazing, even Google image (cute cats pictures)! :)


Happy anger expressing!


Em

Blogtember Day 2 - Around the World in 80 Days

"If you could take three months off from your current life and do anything in the world, what would you do?"

Seriously, what would you do??

What would I do???

Hmm.... There are times indeed in my daily life when I feel like I just CANNOT wake up and face that day.

So, assuming I am in such days... Wait, hold on, actually a 3 months break sounds good ANYTIME! But my mind cannot help not to make parameters for this. So let's make this less fun:

Case 1:
When I have to take 3 months off, as is in my current condition, in the most realistic way.
Then I would ....

1. Spend my days at home.
2. Sleep all day to evade reality.
3. Worry about my mortality.
4. Be depressed about how underachieving I am compared to my peers and generally other people.

BUT, I might also:

1. Pick up my a new skill.
2. Make more videos and blog post drafts and publish them at the very end of the 3 month period (procrastination and self doubt take over)
3. Enjoy it so much that 3 months feels like a breeze.
4. Feel extremely relaxed and ready to take on life challenges afterwards.

Let's keep off our wishes of finding a date on these times to a nonexistent. Since that is what is likely to happen. Oh yeah, such joy optimistic view. :D


Now on to the fun part! after all those gloomy depressing lines *cue in the happy music now*.
Case 2:
If I will be ...

1. paid during the 3 months, and...
2. have an unlimited amount of financial resources in my bank accounts.

Then ... Woohoo! I would ...

1. Go around the world in 80 days, and try my best to live like the locals. Promise not being an annoying tourist. Unless from my apparent physical distinction, I will stay quiet the whole time and just try to enjoy the FOOD. Okay, maybe the view as well.  Roughly the other 10 days for rest and recovery.
   We'll save the moon for another time. Also, technically, that would be out of this world. Literally.
2. I would put my self in a short course to learn a new skill. I'd love to learn a new language!
3. Set up a business and hire a good marketing guy. Then date the marketing guy. Just kidding.
4. Prepare applications for scholarship.
5. Prepare applications for jobs for big BIG companies.

Oh such a lot to do in only 3 months! In the end of it, it might also be me passing out and be cranky to go back to my normal schedule.

What would you do if you have 3 months off from your current mundane daily tasks? Isn't it fun to daydream? :))

I would add a picture of a big air balloon, but I might add it a bit later on and this line will be deleted by then. I don't know why I just think of big air balloon whenever I say "around the world in 80 days"!


Love,
Em

Some Quick Words... #6 - When things get tough ...

Strew rainbow dust in the tornado if possible, or bleed rainbow instead... ?

Whatever that means...

What I meant really was to make it awesome instead... Kind of try to dance in the rain... The initial image in my mind was a girl who was little by little scarred, scratched, bleeded, and turned to dust particles by a vicious whirlwind...

But then I thought it will be to gory to depict. So no, I thought, rainbow dust instead :).

Sometimes when things get tough we can feel so caught up in the situation and in the end sort of lose a sense of who we are. Questioning almost every aspect of ourselves, losing the will to try anymore, or in my case the easiest tale-tell, neglecting personal appearance. Not extremely. But bad enough for people to notice. :))

Don't! The whirlwind will pass, and may we come out of it with an upgraded version of ourselves. Perhaps even sparkling gold instead.


Yes,
Em

Blogtember Day 1 - What I Come From

Blogtember day 1! Woohoo! The topic for today is to... 

"Describe where or what you come from. 

The people, the places, and/or the factors that make up who you are".

Hmmm... what comes to your mind when you first read the topic?

Well,... personally, for me, it seems like, basically, it boils down to this 1 word: PEOPLE...
To me, whatever place or factor contributions will ultimately be delivered through people.

Nope, not shoving the responsibility of shaping myself to other people. But saying, that what affected me shaping me, were eventually, be it directly or indirectly, these people, through my observations and learned behaviours from them,... or through my learned responses to them. They were a part of my source of knowledge, my shepherds, or my lighthouse so to say.

As for me, these people are namely, my Mum and Dad, and my high school teachers. Say Hello to my Mum, my Dad, and my high school teachers.

 
Yep, the teachers weren't that cheerful.

These are the people who directly or indirectly shaped me (so far). My ME sculptors.


Now writing this, I just realised that it seems like my self development stopped since high school?? Eep!


Anyway,... My mum is a person whom I think will never grow up. Not that it's wronggg (!), as I don't really like to label people as "immature", let alone telling people to 'Oh, grow up you!' (there are really 3 reasons for this I think, if you really want to know; 1. I think growing up is a lifetime development process, 2. it is very subjective, and 3. I feel that if I say that, that sorts of justifies my self that I am mature and the other person is not, the other person is less than me, and thus a sense of arrogance, self-justification, which might be misleading. I don't enjoy that feeling).

Gladly we (me and my mum) have never been checked for mental health, as if we did, I'm sure we'll be labeled by a dozen of mental issues. But just take it in my words, I think she is a very emotional person, girly, and moody sometimes... and she expresses them all the time if you know what I mean (read: can be a test to any ordinary person who are used to ordinary average human responses living under the same roof with her during those times).
Don't get me wrong, Mum, you know I love you in every possible way. :D In every delicate possible way. :P

Also, it is not all bad about her, she has some good qualities too. People would think that she would crack under a lot of stress. She WILL quack and make you want to sack yourself from being around her yes, but she is persistent in pulling it through, and most of the times she will make them through. Point is, she might be tougher than we think. Unless in conditions where it needs petty physical or mental strength, such as opening bottles, fixing the sewing machine, or ... believe it or else, setting the washing machine for a wash. Then, she will use her girl power for things like these. By girl power I mean,... 'FERDYYYYY!!!!!!!!!'. Ferdy is really my Dad, just to make it clear.
Another thing that I really love about my Mum, is that I think she has a timeless beauty, elegance in appearance, and taste of apparels, and the knack to make beauty products and things to take care herself with from bare necessities. I sure do hope she passes down these qualities to me as well. Although whenever I look into the mirror, I think I have more rough manly quality than her obvious feminine quality. Sigh.

Growing up, I never realised how much I would turn up to resemble my mother in behaviours and characteristics. Until... I went on my own venture to find the ever so famous LOVE.

My parents' relationship has always been the only relationship I know of that I can relate and take as an example of. Well, theirs and those depicted Hollywood made romantic-comedies which are likely to be as unrealistic to what are apparently common. My Mum's responses and behaviours can be thought as exclusively my only reference on how a woman should behave in a relationship. Only yes, now I know that my Dad is a specimen of a rare breed of the extincting species of very-very-patient-gentlemen. Yup, that is the species name.


There was a time up until the age of 7-ish where I was very close with my Mum. We would sleep holding hands, mind you. Or more like me asking to hold her finger. She might be fed up with me even by then. My Dad in those days was working all the time, anddd... he would shoo me every time he was doing his work (he worked from home).

But then,... I grew very close to my Dad since, and I also found some things about myself that, no doubt, was learned from him. My late night and long showers are definitely learned from him, my helplessness stoic stance against emotional people also came from him, ... and maybe, just maybe (wishing), my sense of humour if I have any. Quirky, funny, and self-depreciating.
My father was also a very hard worker. He is also persistent (Ticked! Now I have this trait from both my parents), but with very little self confidence sometimes.


Now on to my last influence, my high school teachers! See when it was time to pick my high-school, I succumbed to the will of my Mum and fate to be enrolled in a... well, I wouldn't say posh, but it was prestigious. Girls my age back then would join the Hunger Games to be in it. Well not literally. Little did they know it was also some kind of Hunger Games once you're inside. A mental kind of Hunger Games.

Pardon me, okay, let me explain. It was a top high school that parents who wanted badly to be proud of their girls (it was an all girl very strict school), want their girls to be enrolled in. Badly, and I mean badly.

Now, there are some characteristics that will naturally come if you have ever been involve with such school:
1. Pride
2. Slight Jane Austen conventional feminism
3. Competitiveness
4. Social awkwardness
Please, the closest contact to a boy that we could get was the remains of the school janitor's fingertouch on our desks while cleaning them. Erm, that came out wrong...

Anyhow, these traits, were what were reflected perfectly on our school teachers, which very unsurprisingly were mostly (really, 90%-10%)... FEMALE! They seem fit to be Professor McGonagall's closest lady friends. Even Professor McGonagall was once married apparently. But these teachers, they chose themselves NOT to marry.
Now in my earliest clue of spinsterhood I start to think about them more than often. How I can understand even more their pattern of thinking, and how it rubbed me more than I thought I allowed. Hmmm... forging my way to the perfect path of Beatrix Potter. Not as great.


It was fun. I hope you had fun too reading it. Oh, it is always fun to be given the chance to 'talk' about our own parents. :P Or, okay, I might made this chance myself.


Happy Blogtember!

Em

Let's Sit and Have a Cup of Tea

Hello,

A mail delivery for a cup of tea? :))

How are you? Please take a seat... I believe this  is the first time we meet for a cup of tea?... :)

My name is Em, it is from Emillia. :) Please do come in and take a seat. It is rather scorchingly hot and humid these days, or else we shall sit leisurely at the terrace, but for today, shall we get some shade inside overlooking the terrace instead?

Today I have prepared for us a pot of tea (and endless stream of hot water, no worries, as much as my monthly water bill can take), ooh, it's still steaming in there! :)) Milk and sugar, of course, both brown and white. I don't know how you usually take your tea, so I have both. I also have lemons, and shortbread biscuits! To dip in the tea too of course! Store-bought though, I'm afraid. Has the oven been fixed I would've prepared some plain sugar biscuits,... or coconut biscuits? Or peanut butter cookies?... Mmm... I'm sorry I'm rambling... Ooh, I forgot to tell you I also have a plate of jasmines from the garden here, haha, no, please don't eat them! But I like to brew my tea with some jasmines too. They will come out very fragrant and lovely. I'm sorry if this sounds odd to you, my father even likes to brew bay leaves with his tea. Now that I don't like. :) Do you reckon lemon peel will work though? Then we'll make some lemon tea! :D

August has been a roller coaster of letting go and embracing new things if I may say. A lot of catching up with old friends, a lot of new experiences, new understandings, but as always with welcoming new things seems like we have to let go of some other things.

The person I was with also decided to leave me early in the month, well, I did care about this person, and I thought he would stay forever, oh... young love... :) I guess I do have some growing up to do... But imagine how lovely it will be to stay young at heart forever, probably not the evading the responsibility part, but to keep feeling, viewing, and experiencing the world with the same excitement every day like a kid will do. :)

In other view, since early in July I had my first AMAZING allergic reaction which successfully put me in bed for a whole month (well it was pretty serious), and shocked me pretty much since I have never ever had any allergic reactions to anything my whole life before then! Well, this month I think I finally found out that I am allergic to shrimp, seafood and such, because I kept getting some (much) milder version of the reaction every time I eat some of them. I knew that foul smelling calamari rings really did have something quite foul about it. Shame it looked so lovely.

Also, someone close to me got back from Greece around the middle of the month, and she bought (and brought) me some pretty trinket. I think I will show you after this, it is this little blue bracelet which I love. It is very very lovely! I might be biased though, you know blue is one of my favourite colours! :))

In this month also, I have been posting (and doing) more than I ever think I could. I also got some lovely comments too, so really thank everyone who has commented, read, or even take a time to visit this minuscule space in the world wide (very complicated) web of mine.

Anyway, please let me ask again, how are you doing? Please let me know below,... or leave your link,... I will listen ever so patiently and excitedly! :) Or... please, do head over to the lovely and creative Abi's from Creating Paper Dream, if you haven't yet, this was an invitation from her monthly event for this cup of tea... Isn't it lovely? :) This supposed to go up on the 27, but who am I if I'm not always late...


Oh, it has been fun... :) I feel like Alice in a better tea party than the Mad's. Thank you very much for joining me... Can I give you a hug before you leave? Hope to see you soon... Have a lovely day! *wave
Please come and join me again next month!


Happily yours, xo, ♥
Em